Sunday, March 30, 2008

Babies who won't sleep

am I the only one who has this model of baby? If I had known there was an option for the "sleeping baby" model, I would have ordered it. I certainly would not have ordered TWO of the non-sleeping model.

They are 9 months old. I feel like they should be able to sleep more than 4 or 5 hours at a time. They eat three decent sized meals of solid foods and nurse 4-5 times a day. They have a nightly ritual with baths and pjs and nursing that's been going on for months.

So why did bedtime begin at 7:15pm and end now-ish at 8:45? It's not even really fully over as I can still hear someone periodically shriek from the crib.

I have dear dr. ferber's book and the man would probably be a genius had I had only one baby. even one of the non-sleeping models. But I simply cannot let one baby cry for several hours while the other one is inches away. It gets on her (the other baby's) nerves. And by that I mean, causes her to join in the cacauphony of screams. Which makes me want to run away. literally. I feel like a terrible mother as I am at the point where the crying doesn't make me feel bad, it just annoys me.

I can't move them out of my bedroom since the other bedrooms in the house are upstairs and there is no way on god's green earth that I am going to be dragging my fat ass up the stairs 4 and 5 times a night. I don't even want to do it once a day. There are weeks where I don't venture to that floor of the house at all :)

So I'm tired. and I have no quality of life as I live in fear of bedtime. The whole day could be great with laughs and giggles and fun and when 6:00 rolls around I go into a mild panic about how to get them to go to sleep and leave me alone. so I can have 5 minutes to myself. until petey parks himself on my lap.

Apparently I'm not allowed to have no one touching me.


Eva said...

Well, if you've been to my blog like, ever, you know we've had sleep issues for, like, ever. We did improve things with sleep training, though they're still not perfect. I wasn't comfortable with the Weisbluth, close the door and don't open it until morning, no matter what, way. So although I'm strict at bedtime, I do check on them, and if someone cries for more than a few minutes in the middle of the night, I do go to them. I'm tired all the time still, but it's what I feel comfortable with. We did, though, separate them for a couple of months during sleep training, though it sounds like that won't work for you. Are they both still sleeping in your room? I wonder if being so close by makes you too attentive to their needs... just a thought. We now have 2 closed doors between us so they have to be pretty upset at 3:00 AM for me to wake up (that sounds cruel, sorry).

I hope things improve for all of you very soon!

Kerry Lynn said...

OMG I so feel your pain. The feeling of dreading bedtime (or naptime). It really puts a damper on things. And you're not a bad mom for the crying to annoy're human!

My sleep history is completely different from Eva's. My two were perfect sleepers from day 1. I was incredibly blessed especially as I was reading of Eva's sleep woes. At 9ish months everything went to crap. Most of the issues stem from Jackson. Screaming when put in the crib for bed or nap, waking in the middle of the night and not going back to sleep, waking Madison. At first I would run to get him before he woke her up but then there was no putting him back in their room so he'd have to sleep with us. I did that for about 3 weeks then I realized I was creating a monster so I just stopped. I turned off the monitor, closed both of our doors and only go get him if it's an overly urgent cry which has only happened twice since I started this. What I learned was that Madison doesn't wake up when he cries. I was shocked but it was very good to know.
Then around 11 months bedtime horror started. Jackson refused to go to bed without screaming then Madison joined in. We just stuck to our guns by leaving them. They did eventually fall asleep and every night they cried for less and less time. Less than a month later bedtime and naptime are perfect again.
I feel like it's just stages on their part. Who knows what was bothering him? Teeth? Overtired? But I'm sure our sleep will be disturbed again at some point.
Eva, you don't sound cruel. It's good for them to be able to help themselves sometimes. Plus if I thought it was cruel that would mean that I was cruel too ;-)

Keep your chin up and stick to your guns. You're in control, not them! HAHA